A Blueberry Pickin' We Will Go....

Yesterday, we went blueberry picking for the 3rd year.  It has now become an annual event at our house.  Kristen and I rounded up 9 kids and ventured out into the heat...

The crop this year wasn't as good as it has been in years past, but it was still a fun outing.  The kids favorite part, of course, is the playground that is on the property that they were able to utilize at the end.  My worst fears came to pass this year and my daring Alyssa, the climbing fool, fell off of the slide right onto her back.  Not gonna lie, I had visions of some scary results from this, but luckily, it just knocked the wind out of her.  Then, she went right back to climbing...of course.  

Kids everywhere!

Zach was my best picker this year...

They were hot and faded fast!

Emma looks like she means business - but maybe picked about 5 blueberries total...

Sophie gets her drink fix...

Playground fun

Evil Canevil

Wish I had a yard like this!

Thankful for my many blessings...

Happy 4th of July!

Perspective

When I was a kid, a new primary song came out.  The song is called "I'll Walk With You" by Carol Lynn Pearson.  I thought it was kind of a lame song - not because of the content, but because the tune wasn't quite as catchy as some of the favorites such as "I Hope They Call Me on a Mission", "We'll Bring the World His Truth", etc.  Now that I have a child who is special needs, this song means a lot more to me.  It still isn't the catchiest song in the Primary Songbook, but the words are very powerful.

Having a child with Autism has been a difficult road.  We are constantly assessing things, figuring out new avenues and ways to help him.  It is so hard for me to watch my little boy have such a hard time grasping new concepts and to also watch him be a total social mess.  There always have been and always will be people who do not understand Reagan.  There are always going to be people in the grocery store who look at me weird because he talks funny, or because he is throwing a fit because he doesn't understand something.  I am learning to look the other way and ignore...but it hurts.  It isn't embarrassment, so much as my profound grief that he will never be like other people and just "get it".  Sometimes, I just want to hide myself and him away in our own little world so that he can't be hurt.  Even though Autism is a "social" disorder, Reagan is very aware when people are making fun of him or being mean.  There have been days when he has come to me, crying in frustration.

If only people could see what I see and what we deal with on a daily basis, there would be a different understanding.  I get frustrated with him sometimes myself...and usually, I am knocked to the ground by something that he says or does that helps me to know how lucky I am to be blessed with such a good little spirit.  Is he perfect?  No.  Can he be a brat sometimes?  Yes.  Are there people who will never understand?  Of course.  Would I give him away, if I had the chance?  Never.  Do I wish that he and I both did not have this cross to bear?  Sometimes.  I will not lie - I wouldn't wish being locked into a social prison upon anyone.  Reagan's life would be a lot easier, if he were just "normal".  Our family life would be easier...we wouldn't have to come up with something to feed him with because of his weird food habits; we wouldn't be thinking constantly about how to handle certain situations; I wouldn't dread going to public places - in case they are an unknown trigger to an overstimulated meltdown.

People look at him, and see a 7 year old.  What they don't see is that he has the social abilities of a 3 year old.   Milestones are usually hit - but much, much later than a normal child would hit them.  Yes, I get frustrated at times, but I have learned over the years that my role as Reagan's mom is to teach him, love him, fight for him (a lot) and accept him for who he is.  Sometimes, he is the glimmer of sunshine in an otherwise dark day.  Other days, he is the cloud that covers the sun (because of a particular bad mood he may be in).  

Most of the time, I am left in wonder at some of the things he has accomplished and that he has had to deal with in his little life.  A lot of surgeries and therapies, etc. etc. and people still can't understand him.  He wants to be understood, though...and if you listen closely enough - he just may surprise you.  This year, he has just started to say prayers by himself...yes, something that others do years before this...but he is doing it...and he wants to do it...Sometimes I worry about his future and I wonder what will happen - and I can't face it or think that far ahead.  I just live in the present right now...and do the best that I can as the protector of a courageous little spirit who is fighting to be heard.

Here are the words to the song - if you haven't heard it before...my perspective these days has changed drastically.

"I'll Walk With You "

by Carol Lynn Pearson

If you don’t walk as most people do,
Some people walk away from you,
But I won’t! I won’t!
If you don’t talk as most people do,
Some people talk and laugh at you,
But I won’t! I won’t!
I’ll walk with you. I’ll talk with you.
That’s how I’ll show my love for you.
Jesus walked away from none.
He gave his love to ev’ryone.
So I will! I will!
Jesus blessed all he could see,
Then turned and said, “Come, follow me.”
And I will! I will!
I will! I will!
I’ll walk with you. I’ll talk with you.
That’s how I’ll show my love for you.

So Thankful....

Well, despite being a total IDIOT and not backing up any of our pictures, we have been blessed beyond our expectations...I found a company that was able to completely save everything that I had lost...

Heck, they even saved some stuff that I deleted that I'd rather not remember...such as, thousands of cookies and temporary internet files that I now have to delete from everything...but - I am not complaining...all of our vacation pics, baby pics, random cuteness pics are accounted for!  It actually was a pretty cheap lesson - it cost a lot less than I thought it would...

To celebrate the joy that filled my heart this afternoon when the little UPS guy came to the door with our new external hard drive full of memories, I am going to post some random pics - just because I can!  When I look at other people's blogs - I really go looking for new pics, so here you go...

The family at the zoo - summer 2010

Emma and her favorite, Cinderella - July 2010

Love this pic!  Kids at Cocoa Beach in FL - 2010

The 3 that weren't afraid of Mickey and Minnie

Alyssa may have eaten sand - not sure

Zach testing out his strength...

Ashleigh - when she was still afraid of the grass!

Reagan dancing to the sound of the surf - Love this kid!

When the Cat's Away....

So, when the cat is away at your house, what do the mice do to pass the time?

Here is a hint of what the female majority in our house did today while Dad and the boys were at soccer practice...

It is pretty difficult to hogtie two toddlers while waiting for nails to dry - but I did prevail!  And now we all have spring-like/sandal ready toes...If it ever gets here, that is!!!  (Spring)

I sure love my little beauties!

High Aspirations...AKA: "When I Grow Up"

Reagan has been pretty funny lately, telling us about his plans for the future.

Honestly, it is nice to know that he is making plans for his future - I was pretty sure that there was going to be a bonus room full of super heroes and comic books, complete with Mom and Dad downstairs!  Not a bad plan, but his are much better to listen to...

The other day, he went to Clay and said, "Hey Dad, When I grow up, I am going to be a Red Box worker at McDonalds..."  We thought, "Hey, why not - it combines his two greatest loves...redbox movies and the McDonalds restaurant...could work - except there really isn't anyone that mans the redbox station, but it's a start, right?"

Then, tonight he brought me a pad of Post-It notes and a crayon - and asked for some tape.  He said, "I'm making a book.  When I grow up, I'm going to write books...this one is about the ABC's."  He then said, as if reading the title of a book..."The ABC's, by Reagan Turner...no, wait...by Doctor Reagan." (He learned about Dr. Suess today at school - it is his birthday, I gather.)

Clay turned to me and said..."Hey, we're moving up in the world!  Sure beats a Redbox worker at McDonald's!"

887...The sweetest number I know...

A few weeks ago, I woke up and turned on the computer...It wouldn't boot up.

Dun Dun Dun...you say?  Yup.  You are right.  My hard drive crashed, and in a big way.

I was am completely heartbroken.

Why?

Because I was a moron and didn't back up ANYTHING.

Yes, I am the type who always puts things off for tomorrow, figuring that there will always be another day - and nothing will happen, right?  Wrong.

The worst part about all of it is my pictures.  The computer is 2 1/2 years old - and there were 2 1/2 years plus worth of pics on the computer.  So sad.  Baby pics of my last two babies, Christmas a few years worth, our Disney vacation last summer and tons of random shots...thousands of pictures.

At this point, it is looking like nothing will be able to be recovered.

Today, I was organizing/cleaning/gutting my house and I ran across my old digital camera.  My new Rebel is only about a year old, so I found this camera and my heart began to race.  You see, not only do I not back up hard drives very well at all, but I also am pretty lazy about emptying my memory cards.

I popped that memory card into the laptop of doom and tears came to my eyes.  887 pictures still on that card!  I am really only missing a year's worth of photos instead of the 3 plus that I was originally missing.

Even though I still don't have our vacation pics and countless others, I have pictures from the births of my last two babies, a lot of baby pics and other sweet shots of the other kiddos...I am choosing to look at this glass as half (heck 3/4) of the way full!

This incident brings to mind the parable of the 10 virgins...and yes, I am among the 5 who were unprepared.

Next time, I am going to be more prepared...and this goes for a lot of things in my life that, upon reflection, I need to work on.

Oh, and what would this story be without a public service announcement???

BACK UP YOUR COMPUTERS!!!

Today, 887 is the sweetest number I know...

Here are a few of the gems that I found today...

Emma at age 4

Reagan, telling us all about something

Little Miss Diva Ashleigh

A very scruffy Mr. Miagi, trying out the walker - and yes, he jumped in by himself!

Alyssa's 1st piggies

Zach shows his pearly whites

Wait a minute...how did that get in there?

Clay, trying out a new ride

Ashleigh and I on our girl vacay in Sept. 2009